Thursday, August 26, 2010

Letter from the folks at home

( This came from a little weekly paper my grandparents get... enjoy! )
~ Kate


I am writing slow ’cause I know you can’t read fast. We don’t live where we used too. Your pa read an article that said most accidents happen within 20 miles of home. So we moved. This new place has a washing-machine. The first day we got here I put all your shirts in it. I pulled the chain and ain’t seen ‘em since.
The front porch fell off yesterday and went down the river. It wouldn’t have ben so bad except we lost two freezers, three washing-machines, and a Sears dryer. Pa said he believed one of ‘em would’ve worked if we had electricity.
It only rained twice this week, once for three days and four days the second time. I sent the coat you wanted. Aunt Sue said it would be too heavy to mail with them big brass buttons on it, so I cut ‘em off and and put ‘em in the pocket. We got a bill from the funeral home. It said that if we don’t pay the last payment on Grandma’s burial, she comes up.
Your Uncle John fell in the whiskey vat down at work yesterday. Four men tried to rescue him but he fought them off ’till he drowned. We had him cremated and he burned fer three days.
Your brother broke his leg while doing yard work. He was raking leaves and the tree limb broke.
Three of yor friends were in a terrible accident. They were riding in a pickup truck and ran off the bridge. The driver managed to get the window open and swim to safety. The other two drowned. They couldn’t get the tailgate down…
The police chief got a new car. He wrecked it the first night. He got his leg caught in the steering wheel while tying to dim the headlights.
Well, that’s about it. If I get any more news I’ll write again.
PS. – I was going to send you some money but had already sealed the envelope.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

"Well I was fixin' to!!!" The Innocence and Danger of Procrastination.

I was seriously fixin' to write a post for the blog forever. *ahem* I just, uh, didn't get to it till now.

You see me (and many other fellow Southerners) have, over time, become accustomed to the "fixin' to" mentality. We've grown up with it. We've known no different. Around here the excuse for anything is "Well I was fixin' to". From the house not being cleaned for three months to the laundry sitting in the washer for three hours. We are always "fixin'" to do it, but we don't always stick to it. We wait, and we wait, and we wait. We push it off, cause seriously... why bother with the mundane things of life?!

Sometimes it's okay. Things can wait. The book doesn't have to be read right now. You don't have to go the the grocery store right this minute. But sometimes, the "fixin' to" mentality hurts. And it hurts bad. What if you were "fixin' to" get the car fixed, but never did, and now you are stranded on the highway with no one to help? What if you were "fixin' to" get that barn roof fixed before it caved in, but too late, it did, and your little kid was in there when it happened? What if you were "fixin' to" repair your relationship ship with your husband, wife, brother, sister, mother, father, you name it, and apologize for the bad blood between you, but you found out it's too late.... they're gone?

I could go on, and on, and on! There are so many things we are "fixin' to do" that need to be done right now. While it is important to take the time to step back and go slow, there are times when you need to do things right away... no procrastinating. We have to learn to evaluate what needs doing now, and what won't hurt to put off. There's such a delicate balance, it's hard to truly pinpoint it. It is something each and everyone of us should evaluate for ourselves.

But point in hand, here I am. Guilty as charged. Yeah. I was "just fixin' " to post on here since the last one, but haven't 'til today. And so I have most likely killed my poor dear blog... :'( . It's rather ironic, isn't it, that I would procrastinate about righting a post on procastination, huh? But here I am. Again. Let's hope that I don't do this again!


Wednesday, May 19, 2010

I Think This One Speaks For Itself....

O, I wish I was in the land of cotton
Old times there are not forgotten
Look away! Look away!
Look away! Dixie Land.

In Dixie Land where I was born in
Early on one frosty mornin'
Look away! Look away!
Look away! Dixie Land.

O, I wish I was in Dixie!
Hooray! Hooray!
In Dixie Land I'll take my stand
To live and die in Dixie
Away, away,
Away down south in Dixie!

Old Missus marry Will, the weaver,
William was a gay deceiver
Look away! Look away!
Look away! Dixie Land.

But when he put his arm around her
He smiled as fierce as a forty pounder
Look away! Look away!
Look away! Dixie Land.

O, I wish I was in Dixie!
Hooray! Hooray!
In Dixie Land I'll take my stand
To live and die in Dixie
Away, away,
Away down south in Dixie!

His face was sharp as a butcher's cleaver
But that did not seem to grieve her
Look away! Look away!
Look away! Dixie Land.
Old Missus acted the foolish part
And died for a man that broke her heart
Look away! Look away!
Look away! Dixie Land.

O, I wish I was in Dixie!
Hooray! Hooray!
In Dixie Land I'll take my stand
To live and die in Dixie
Away, away,
Away down south in Dixie!

~Lyrics to Dixie.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Duct Tape Revisited- ideas that are totally awesome!

Plaid duct tape. Need I say more!!! :D

^This equals waaaaay too much fun for a Southerner that also possesses zip ties.

Hey, why not?!

Now I think this is creative. It's gotta be sturdy...

You never would have guessed this was made out of duct tape, would you?

Another wallet, this one looks more complicated.

So I'm running low on post ideas at this present time... anything you guys would like to see in particular? Serious, funny, Southern, even Northern (don't expect it to be a gushing post on the "good qualities" of the North, cause it won't be), just whatever you'd like to see! Leave us a comment and let us know!

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Why I love the South, and the dilemma.

Why I love the South is truly hard to put into words... but it's definitely something I am passionate about. Maybe it's the hospitality, the cheery smiles, the slow paced life. Maybe it's cause I was born and raised here. Maybe it's the warmth and sunshine. I think it's all of the above.

But the dilemma is that the reasons I love the South are beginning to fade away. In the ever changing society and the flood of new habits and hobbies, we are losing the very things we are known for. The South is known for it's genteel manners. Children are taught from early ages the rights and wrongs of etiquette. Honor and respect are valued and held high. Sure, we don't have the best grammar and our words tend to be all slurred and pulled way out of proportion, but hey, at least we talk nice (generally).

The South was known for it's friendly, warm hospitality. When you visited you were heartily invited to join the family and treated with more honor than you could dish up with a soup ladle. Guests were special... maybe more so than the queen of England herself. Life here almost came to a standstill. There was no rushing to and fro, "I gotta get this done, need to go here, have to get this. NOW!". No, we took our time and enjoyed shopping and visiting friends. We enjoy lingering after church and enjoying fellowship meals with one another. Granted, there are times when things have to be sped up and we must meet the demands of a time schedule, but most of the time we take our time. As a dear friend said, "There's never any 'doing' with you guys. It's always 'fixing to'." Yes, we are always 'fixing to' do something (and it will eventually get done) but that's the beauty of life. Rather than rushing through and getting things done, we take our time, enjoy it, and create memories to look back on later.

And then, too... I was born in the South. My family's lived in the South for over 160 years. This is our home, it's in our blood. I am a proud Southerner, and I always will be! I take joy in the culture, mannerisms, and speech patterns of 'my people'. It is here I am home, and to think of living elsewhere (well... besides Cali, but that's a whole 'nother story) seems almost like treason. You can take the girl out of the South, but you can never take the South out of the girl. Ever.

The warmth and sunshine is another thing... life without seeing the sun is... unthinkable. I love the sun, I love the warmth (heat, really, but who really cares?). Can't say I love the humidity, but you know, life isn't perfect. I love to smell the fresh air of the countryside and breath in the smell of the orange blossoms and other sweetly scented flowers. All fed by the sun and rich soil (well... sand for where I live) of the South. I couldn't imagine not seeing cows grazing on green pastureland and driving by thickly scented orange groves. Imagine not seeing the huge, white fields of cotton, strectched out like an ocean. That would be.... sad.

But all of this is fading fast... the hospitality, respect for one another (I mean, we're all just glorified animals now, according to the scientists), the friendly smiles aren't so common, the cities are taking up the farmland, and the only thing left is that life is still somewhat slower.

What will we do when the South is gone? What will we do when the heart of the South has turned stone cold? And these concepts aren't even something that should be all Southern... what if we all stepped up and were a little more friendly? What if we all took the time to enjoy life and all that it gives us? What if, as Christians, we all showed a little more respect for one another? When you come down South, you don't go back the same. What if we all took the time to change a life, and put aside our own agendas for others. Not only would the South come back, but the name of Jesus would be glorified and souls could be saved!

So I suppose my point and challenge is to reconsider your daily life, and make time for some true Southern traditions. Smile a lot, lend a helping hand, face life straight on, take time to enjoy what comes, and respect one another with love in Jesus Christ.

Friday, May 7, 2010

A Letter From My Favorite Great-Aunt!

Now, this isn't to laugh at, because the writer is my favorite Aunt, and she wrote it right from the heart! It's the way us people talk, when we are family! :)

So, this is the letter...

Hey Ya'll!

Thank you so-so-oo much for the Birthday card and $20.00. Man,I can buy several packs of Pinto beans with that!! I love my pinto beans and cornbread with a big onion. I just never did get above my raising, which is alright.

You beautiful people, if I had wings I would just flutter right up you way, and peep in the window at you, and say "well, here I am. Come on let's check upon the farm animals", but all I have is two 77 yr. old arms and legs and so I am grounded in Blacksburg. When we get to Heaven I hope your mansions are right next door to mine, can't you imagine what fun we will have!

Now milk the cows and churn some buttermilk and cook some cornbread. And I'll flutter up your way. Until then I'm sending all my love. Pray for me as I pray for you all. I love you the mostest. Jesus ever loves you more.
Annie Sue

Kaitland has been nagging me to post, and I've not 'ere you go! Kate has returned. ;)

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Toilet Planters... oh so fun!

Okay, so some people say they're silly, stupid, hideous... whatever. I say they are good recycling and creativity put into practical use. Whatever way you look at them... they are hilariously funny, captivatingly interesting, and totally out of this world (or bathroom, whatever).

Pretty in Pink!
Hey, guys, these are for sale! How much would ya'll pay?

What a beautiful finishing touch to this countryside garden. =D

Oh so patriotic. This is the true American spirit! Freedom to be creative!!!

Now these are some artistic toilets....
So tell us, what is your favorite? Do you hate them all together? What first comes to mind when you hear 'toilet planters'? Is this a Southern thing only, or do ya'll Northerners find this awesomely amusing? Let us know in a comment!

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Two Lives Well Lived.

This has nothing to do with the South. This has nothing to do with anything you would ever expect to be put on this blog. But this is a post well deserved, and it shall be written. Today was a day of tragedy and yet hope. Today (April 26, 2010) around 6:30 pm Ryan Modrow (18) and Daniel Walters (22) died in a motorcyle accident. We lost two friends, two young men- sons, brothers, friends- in a tragic accident, and yet there is hope. These young men weren't just any young men. They were followers of Christ. The hope lies not in what they have done, but in what was done some two thousand years ago to give us hope today, tonight, and in the weeks to come. The grief is still here; it won't leave for years to come. But with the grief there is hope. They aren't gone. Their lives aren't ended. They have only just begun.

Ryan, I haven't known you long, and I may not know you well, but we had some fun times, and pulled some good pranks on each other. You always had a knack for dropping jokes at just the right time. You had a way of making everyone about you smile when you were doing the same. You were kind and caring, and you are sorely missed. You touched so many lives! Ryan, God had his hand on you, and loved you to the end of the life you lived here on this earth. I cannot even imagine the glory you are experiencing in Heaven. You will be missed.

His sister Hannah on the left, Ryan on the right.

Ryan to the left, Daniel on the right.

Daniel, I never talked with you, but I did know your brothers and sisters. You were greatly loved and respected, and you, too, will be missed. The Lord knew every hair on your head, and your death was not unexpected to Him. He called you home, and I know you will be happy there. There will be no more pain there. No more suffering, no more pain. We cannot understand the ways of God, but I know that what God has allowed to happen was for the best. Daniel, your family and friends love you, and you will always be in their hearts.

I know that we cannot know why they died when they did. But regardless of that, they lived full lives. Their lives were not in vain. God used them to touch so many others. The Bible tells us in James 4: 13-15 that life is a vapor:

Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city,
spend a year there, buy and sell, and make a profit”; whereas you do not know
what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that
appears for a little time and then vanishes away. Instead you ought to say, “If
the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that.”

And I know that neither Ryan's nor Daniel's lives were empty. Both lived wonderful lives and leave behind many, many loved ones. And these loved ones will treasure their memory forever. You will never be forgotten. The day will come when all will reunite with ya'll in Heaven, and there will be much rejoicing. Until then, we love ya'll.

~God didn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, sun without rain. But He did promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears, and light for the way. =`)

A peek at a Southern Ball.

So imagine with me for a second... the old, antebellum South. The elite Mr. Jeffrey Jenkins

recieves an invitation to attend a party held by Mr. George Thornburton

and his lovely wife Millie
and their children John and Annabelle

in honor of their daughters Carolina and Ella May.

And so Mr. Jenkins winds his way through the many oak lined roads of the Southern plantations, coming upon the one that leads to Magnolia Hall, the residence of the afore mentioned Thornburton family.

Eventually coming upon Magnolia Hall itself. Beautiful, isn't it? Just imagine living in one of them things... I bet it was just dandy! Anyhow, we must continue our journey...

The day time find the Porch of Magnolia Hall vacated... there are things to be done... no time for lounging around! There's a regular ball to prepare. Baking to be done, dresses to be ironed and put on, hair to be done, cravats to be tied. Not to mention lectures to John and Annabelle on proper manners... not that they don't know, just a reminder to use them.

And by the beginning of the evening to late in the night we see it all transformed... the gas lights burning, the music playing. Belle's in their luxurious dresses, and their hair piled high on their heads in braids, curls, and ringlets; flowers, pearls, and diamonds (wishful thinking here) fixed in their high stylin' hair. The gentlemen prance about (that sounds mighty funny, hehe) asking all the pretty ladies for a dance, or conversing with the other gentlemen present, dressed to the nines and acting the part of a true Southern dignitary. "Would you like some punch, Miss Carolina?" "Oh, if you would, Mr. Jenkins. Thank you kindly." Waving her fan to cool herself after a sprightly Virginia reel.

Later on it's time for walks in the moonlight at talks in the gardens. "You do look lovely tonight, Miss Ella May." "Why thank you, Mr. Jackson," she says, blushing. "Please may I have the honor of accompanying you on a walk through the gardens on this glorious night?" "You may. Shall we ask Mr. Jenkins and Carolina to join us? I imagine they would love the invitation as well." "Of course we shall, the more the merrier!"
And so the night is enjoyed by the young people of the South as they eat, drink, and stroll through the gardens, breathing in the refreshingly pleasant smell of the magnolias that are budding and blossoming as are our dear young ladies into true Southern Belles.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

The Heart of Hospitality.

I know that we tend to post rather on the humorous side of things, but this time I would like to break with tradition and post on something that has been much on my mind lately. This is the thought, the idea, the very essence of the very hospitality and kind thoughtfulness that is often spoken of in the South. And the place I have noticed it most is, to me, seemingly the most unlikely. At a Publix grocery store in the retirement city of Florida. Now generally I do not do the grocery shopping at Publix, so this is probably why I never cease to wonder at this, but I am getting ahead of myself...

So yes, normally when I go grocery shopping I prefer to have as little interaction with strangers as is possible, or desirable. So going shopping at Walmart is all fine and dandy with me. No offers to help me with my groceries, or heart felt "Is there any way I can help you?" with a genuine smile to grace the face of the willing associate. At Walmart it's a get in, get out ordeal that really doesn't leave me with anything other than a sigh of relief to be done with the grocery shopping for the day, knowing I'll most likely have to go back tomorrow (because I can ,never, ever manage to remember everything we need even with a list).

But now let's cross the street. Walmart's rival stands there, tall and glorious, surrounded by stately trees spaced throughout the parking lot. Having graced our town a good deal longer than the Walmart next to it, it's still a favorite here and about. What makes it such a hometown favorite? The buy one get two free sales, perhaps? They don't have those too often... so I doubt that would be the key. Is it the everyday prices then? Uh, well.... Walmart definitely rivals them in that... so I highly doubt that. And this I have found to be the key. Once you've gotten to the front, chosen the line with the least miles to stand in, and finally made it to the cashier, you aren't greeted with a monotone "Hello, welcome to -----". Rather you are greeted with a genuine "Hello! Did you find everything you need? Anything I can help you with?". As you are walking out the bagboys (which is like.... haha... ummm.... a loose way to use that phrase, but stick with me and you'll see why)sincerly ask you, "Do you need help getting to your car? Can I assist you with your groceries?".

Now, you may ask (if you're still reading... yes, I know this is may seem like incredible rambling [and probably is] but there is a point), "What's the deal? It's just a store with nice service." Yes, that's true, it is a store with nice service. But beyond that... it's the people. The difference wasn't the store, the prices, the sales, it was the people. And the difference in the people was... age. The people that worked at Walmart were younger... teens, early 20's and 30's. There were few elderly that worked there. But at Publix the staff was made up of... well... old people. And that is what made it so extrordinary to me. These old ladies greeting you with their smiles, asking you how your day went, and taking the time to make you feel special. These old men who really probably shouldn't be lifting all those milk jugs and bags of cans are always willing to lend a helping hand to those around them. And I pondered (oh, I really love that word, by the way)over it for days. I couldn't figure it out. Why was it that it was the elderly that were so eager to serve, when the youth were doing it out of necessity? I still don't know the secret, but my conclusion is this... they know something we don't. They know that it is a joy to serve others with an excitement about you. They know that life is short. They were raised to "ask not what others can do for you, but ask what you can do for others". They know that it is more blessed to give than to recieve. And I cannot and do not want to believe that the hospitality that has so characterized the South in the past is now dying down. But if the youth of today can't see this wonderful concept now, how can it stay alive?

Monday, April 12, 2010

You know you're a Southerner when.....

Hey guys!!! Here it is! I hope ya'll enjoy it as much as I did! Feel free to leave a comment or ten. Many thanks to Andrea P. and Timothy for submitting most of these, and I got a couple in there myself. Thanks ya'll!

You know you're a Southerner when-

~ You know what a granny woman is.

~ You never eat biscuits without butter.

~ You know what a green fried tomato looks and tastes like.

~ You live off sweet tea and biscuits.

~ You say ya'll every other sentence.

~ You feel that as long as you add "Bless his/her little heart" you have the right to say whatever comes to mind concerning someone.

~ You've discovered a Water Moccasin living under your RV.

~ You don't say "Northerner" you say "Yankee".

~ You've whittled down a tree in attempts to solve a hard problem.

~ You wonder what was so funny about the "Ten Commandments for Southerners" post.

~ You've probably set a world record for most bottle rockets set off at one time.

~ Every pair of jeans you own has holes in the knees.

~ Your livin' out the song "Thank God I'm a Country Boy".

~ You believe a man's best friend is his favorite gun.

~ You name all your guns.

~ You call everything "coke".

~ 90% of your diet is deep-fried.

~ You think snow is a novelty.

~ You're a Baptist, your relatives are Baptists, and your friends are Baptists (that covers just about everybody).

~ Your truck is older than dirt and twice as dusty.

~ Copperheads are "just something you have to watch out for."

~ You nonchalantly pull ticks out of your dog's ears, all the time.

~ You've used Duck Tape for every imaginable pupose.:D

~ You have a pocket knife for every occasion.

~ You just knew you got that Cracker House question right, even though the ornery test master said ya got it wrong.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Duct Tape Uses- you know they can be crazy.

In an effort to keep our faithful readers faithful, I shall post something today... give me a few minutes to think of a subject, and I shall post, haha. Ummmm....

Okay, how about weird uses for duct tape? Ya'll can feel free to leave your comments adding to the list.

I have seen duct tape used as the handle for a play shield...

To tape a child to the wall for time out (this wasn't us, for the record)...

To fix clothing in place...

To make play swords...

To repair shoes...

To quiet rowdy children ;)...

The list goes on and on and on.... we'd like to hear what uses ya'll have for duct tape. Leave us a comment and let us know!


Friday, March 26, 2010

The 10 Commandments for Southerners- A guest post

The 10 Commandments for Southerners- a guest post by Samuel Dye.

Howdy, just wanna let you know who I am.. Samuel Joel Dye is the name and mighty glad to meet you. Been an avid supporter and reader of this blog from VERY beginning, I highly recommend it! Anyways I was raised a pastors kid and been called to the mission field. I will be headin off to bible college in the next year or so. Hopefully they don't kick me out for my "venacular" interpreation of the 10 Commandments. Anyways ya'll be good and read yer bible every day (oh and don't forget to pray)..

The 10 Commandments:

1. Thar ain't sopost to be no gods afore Him.
2. Yall not supposed to make any idols.. nun wut-so-evar!
3. Usin tha Lord's name in vain 'round here.. tat'll get you strung up.
4. You'd better be thar fer Sunday meetin.
5. Honor yer Maw 'n' Paw.
6. No killing nobody (lest it be in self defence).
7. Ain't sopost be no foolin round with a gal that you ain't hitched to.
8. Takin what ain't yurs.. that'll get ya shot.
9. No tellin tall tales or short ones for that matter.
10. Don’t be hankerin for yer buddy's stuff.

Monday, March 22, 2010

Set yourself right down here on the's Kate!

Hey Ya'll!

Seeing that I'm not exactly famous,(and hopefully not infamous), in the bloggin' world, I thought it was high time to introduce myself!
I was born in the wonderful hills and hollars of Southern West Virginia, and let me assure you, it's the best place this side of the states! While I am now in exile in Ohio, we still visit grandparents and relations in WV and VA, so I am not abandoned. :D
I would looove to visit the west someday! you know that.

I am a farmgirl from the mountains, and you can usually find me in the barn milking, ( yes, I handmilk) or singing opera while washing dishes. It is the obvious mission of my family to generate as many dishes as possible.... :-)
The most important thing in my life is to serve my KING, and to honor him in everything I do!
Second to that, I write like a madwoman, work on the farm, cook whenever I'm told to, sing, (with a dream of singing professionally) play the harp, ( fairly well), the violin, ( pretty good), and the bugle, (rather badly). And hike. Whenever possible.

Really random stuff... I had my first marriage proposal when I was 11. He was 70, and like, married. Maybe I should have taken him up... :D
I can't stand the taste of milk. Yet I milk a cow. Go figure.
I am a LOTR fan girl!
I fall for Cowboys. Every. Single. Time. :D
I have a Scottish Claymore, and it's so cool, and it's my best friend. Other then my .22.
My goal is to be a Godly wife, mother, daughter, and teacher of my children! Is that not the best job a woman can have?

A few pictures should be inline, eh?

My Familia...minus Momma.

Don't ask. :D I guess this woud be me being...a gunslinger. :D

Messin' around with the cowboy hat...every girl needs one. ;)

A "formal" picture. :D

Sunday, March 21, 2010

You can help us!!! :D

I had an idea for a post that we would like everyone to help us with. Now anyone who reads this must know something of the South. So we thought to make a "You know you're a Southerner when..." post, and we would like ya'll's help. You can post your ideas in a comment on this post. We will select 20- 50 of the funniest and truest ones to post here for ya'll. They won't be published, we'll just post the post with our selected ones. We will end the date for posting questions in two weeks, April 4th, unless we decide to extend it a week. Please keep them clean, funny, and acceptable.=)

We will include your first name and (if given) last initial, unless otherwise requested.

Monday, March 15, 2010

Okay, hold the applause and bear with me! It's Kaitland!!! ;)

So, uh, Kate and I talked it over, and we felt that it might be a good idea to introduce ourselves. I guess we figured ya'll would like it if we did that.

So I am Kaitland, and I do live in and love the South! I was born and raised here, and never plan to leave (lest it be to go West). I have loved all things Southern for a long time, the history and culture (if you can call it that) is amazing! There is nothing more fun that getting out the .22 and shooting at cardboard reindeer and Santa's sleigh near Christmas time, and having those backyard bbq's complete with go-cart riding and diet coke and mentos rockets during the summer time.

My family is awesome (I know ya'll will read this later, and yes, I really mean it! ;) )! I love them, I love God, I love reading, writing, music, and writing (I'm sorry, did I mention that before? Well... I love it lots!). I like humour, and I love to laugh at funny things, including jokes made about and by Southerners. I like to make my own humorous observations of the South, and I will hopefully share many of them with ya'll. I hope ya'll have a toe tappin', knee slappin' time as you read this blog!!! =D


Sunday, March 14, 2010

Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Hey Ya'll!
I know way too many people just like this! :D

Borrowed from Nathaniel Brayden...this was WAY too good not to post! :-)

The answer can be found by answering the following question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.
Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock .40 caliber, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?

Republican's Answer:

Democrat's Answer:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.

Southerner's Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click..... (Sounds of reloading)
BANG! Click "Shucks! I'm out!"
Daughter: "Nice pattern Daddy! Were those the Silver Tips, black talons, or them new Hollow Points?"
Son: "Can I shoot the next one Daddy?"
Wife: "You ain't takin' THAT to no Taxidermist!"

So You Think You're a Southerner?

We decided it would really be fun and informative for ya'll if we gave ya'll a way to test your know-how of the South. So Kate and I put together

So You Think You're a Southerner?

It's a doozy of a quiz, and only the true Southerners at heart will pass! When you're done, come back and tell us how ya did!

So You Think You're a Southerner?


And if you were wondering, some of the wrong answers actually came from Northern lips! We just had to add those. :D

For some reason we can't fix the answer to one of the questions. When you tell us your score, tell us your answer to the Cracker house questions, and we'll let you know if you got it right or wrong.


Saturday, March 13, 2010


This blog is going to be more fun than a 'coon hunt in a full moon! Hopefully we'll have loads of posts to keep ya'll doubled in laughter, pondering in wonder, and scratching ya'lls heads in disbelief soon enough. For now, we got to get to writing!!!

We welcome all readers, and hope ya'll enjoy our humorous observations!